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Edmond Family Counseling Articles

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Panic, Don't Panic

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

No, I am not writing about the economy. I am referring to an anxiety based disorder called “panic attacks”. Characteristics of a panic attack include a sudden feeling of intense fear or anxiety that may be characterized by shortness of breath or hyper ventilating, heart pounding in the chest, ...



Satire

03 June 2013
By: Quinton Ellis, M.S.

Let's take a moment, here the end of another school year, with Memorial Day just passing and an interminably long summer beyond that, to put ourselves in the minds of too many of our children. Are they thinking about how they can't wait to get started on that "character building" summer job? Are they looking ...



The Odyssey Years

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, Masters of Science

I am pleased to report to all of you that our social scientists have been hard at work developing a name for the cloud that I and many others some ten years ago sprinted headlong into, clumsily navigated through, and emerged exhaustedly from only just recently. Their hard work has yielded the term "th...



Varsity Blues

03 June 2013
By: Quinton Ellis, M.S.

One of my favorite conversations to engage in with my clients is the one that begins after I express my relief regarding that client s discontentedness with his or her teenage existence. Well of course you hate your life, why shouldn t you? I m liable to remark. Let s face it, as adults, how many of us look b...



What Matters Most

03 June 2013
By: Quinton Ellis, M.S.

Some months ago EFC, in conjunction with Edmond s Character Council and our municipal juvenile courts, developed a community service alternative for teenagers dubbed the What Matters Most program. The purpose of the program would be to explore the concept of personal character and its relationship with the mo...



Youth is Wasted on the Young

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

“Youth is wasted on the young”. I enjoy asking teenagers to interpret this axiomatic quotation. Most don’t know what to make of it, which, one assumes, is confirmation of the quote’s wisdom. If I assign an adult the same task, I will always get an answer as to how young people screw so ...



And How Does That Make You Think?

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

“I know right?”

Have you heard this fairly recent addition to our American lexicon? I can’t be the only one who’s noticed. It’s been around for a couple of years. It is apparently used by a listener to convey to the speaker with great enthusiasm that he or she has he...



"He's Got a Lot of Potential"

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

I remember hearing that frequently when I was in elementary school and for some time after that. My parents, my teachers- they were all apparently very excited about all that I was capable of achieving- in the future. I remember finding it all incredibly satisfying as well as comforting at the time. Whateve...



Deadlines & Skinny Jeans

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

In my experience, deadlines are like the world’s worst ninjas. It’s not as though they just pop up in front of me, all black, silent, and awesome. No, it’s more like this particular ninja was following me all weekend, meticulously shadowing my every move. I know this because I tripped ov...



Idontcaratitis

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

I keep hearing “I don’t care” from the kids. It’s usually followed by some variant of exhalation ranging from the anachronistic “harrumph” to the recently ascendant “Napoleon Dynamite”. Both responses are meant to convey frustration. Why, they wonder, do I c...



Putting Off is Easy

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

Putting off an easy thing makes it hard. Putting off a hard thing makes it impossible. ~George Claude Lorimer

I can’t say that I’m familiar with this George Claude character, but I see evidence of the wisdom of his insight on a daily basis. In fact, I’m staring at it right...



The Day After

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

The day after Bedlam I went to 7-11 and picked up a newspaper. Mainly I was after the sports section, because really, who wouldn’t want to relive that glorious night? As I was rummaging through the various sections, my eyes fell upon the cover of Parade magazine. The photograph depicted a pretty yo...



Love My Job

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis M.S., L.P.C.

I don’t know if everyone knows this already, but talk therapy with young people has a side-effect just as frightening as those from any pill. On occasion, a young person in therapy will experience the desire to become a therapist him or herself. Yeah, I know…creepy. Of course, it’s pe...



In Praise of Low Self-Esteem

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis

We need to clear something up about high self-esteem in our society. Many adults, and an even higher number of our kids, are actually suffering from a state of self-satisfaction that diminishes their ability and responsibility for self-improvement through reflection. We are led to believe that life is only properly ...



The Unthinkable

31 May 2013
By Jackie White Shaw, MED, LPC, LMFT

For most of us, the idea of the sexual abuse of a child is "unthinkable". Although it is very painful to hear that a child may have been abused in this way, it is almost impossible to know that reality unless we acknowledge its existence and work to understand as much as we can of the problem. Th...



What Do You Call "Success"?

31 May 2013
By Jackie Shaw, Executive Director

Edmond Family Counseling, Inc. is celebrating 35 years of service to our community this month. Thousands of people from every type of background, every socioeconomic level, every age and circumstance have walked through our doors during those 35 years. Our agency has offered respect, support, inf...



Please Draw a Picture of a House, A Tree and a Person

31 May 2013
By: Jackie Shaw, Executive Director

In the movies a “shrink” presents his patient with a series of “Ink Blots” on 8x11 cards and asks, “Tell me what you see”. This is known as a Rorschach test. At first glance this may not seem much different from looking at clouds and describing the shapes and ...



When Food is the Enemy - Part 2

31 May 2013
There are varying theories about the cause of an eating disorder, making it difficult to attribute its cause to a single factor. Most experts agree that social influences, perceived lack of control in ones life and striving to meet unrealistic expectations can all contribute to the development of an eating disorder.

Our society is o...



Risky Business

30 May 2013

By Belinda Crosier

Risk-taking is one of the double-edged swords of development and an area in which parents are eternally trying to find the balance between encouraging healthy risks and preventing foolish, dangerous ones which unfortunately abound in adolescence. The normal state of adolescence poses a triple threat for teens ...



3 Rs: Move over for the 3 Ds!

30 May 2013
By Belinda Crosier, M.E., LPC

In the face of impulsive or thoughtless behavior by a teenager, many parents find themselves succumbing to the 3 Rs: rant, rave & rescue. This refers to any lengthy combination of lecturing, castigating, threatening & forecasting of dire outcomes designed to get a kid to change behavior. (Translated: ra...



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