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Edmond Family Counseling Articles

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Anger and a Desire to Change

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

Irritated, annoyed, ticked, hot, enraged and frustrated . . . these are but a few of the words we use to describe anger. Webster's states that anger is a feeling of displeasure and usually of antagonism. According to the America Psychological Association, anger is an emotional state that varies in intensi...



Tevye asked Golde Do You Love Me?

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

In the Musical Fiddler on the Roof, Tevye asked Golde do you love me? After 25 years in a stable/successful marriage which was arranged by his parents and his wife's parents he considers that love may be a central part of marriage. Their parents told them that they would learn to love one another and now ...



Building Fences a Family Project

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

As Alice Cooper stated so eloquently, School's out for summer. Teenagers across our state are busy not making plans beyond sleeping late and staying up late. To be fair, many teens will be engaged in summer jobs, church work camps, mission trips, sports, and a wide variety of positive activities. The real...



Double Standards

04 June 2013
Boys will be Boys
Girls will be Girls

By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

Individual differences are greater than gender differences. To be perfectly clear I will say it again, Individual differences are greater than gender differences. With that being said up front I wish to touch on the fact that boys and girls are diff...



"Dating Drama" from a Dads seat in the House

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

"He is a stupid jerk or a confused wimp". The words a 16 year old girl uses to describe a 16 year old male caught in the snare of dating drama. A situation which is obvious to the detached spectators sitting in the stands watching these scenes play out but completely oblivious to the unfortunate souls pla...



The Five Truths of Life

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

A few weeks ago, back in October, my youngest daughter shared a bit of wisdom she heard at Workcamp with our Church. The presenter was Father Geoff Rose and he shared “The Five Truths of Life” from Father Richard Rohr. I would like to touch base on the 5th truth, “you are going to die&r...



Food Allergies

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

Food is essential to life and, because of this, is at the center of our conversations and activities. In America we enjoy an abundant supply and mind numbing choices of what to eat. We also enjoy a mind numbing number of diet ideas. One which has gained a great deal of attention in the media is “fo...



Panic, Don't Panic

04 June 2013
By John Goetz, M.Ed. L.P.C.

No, I am not writing about the economy. I am referring to an anxiety based disorder called “panic attacks”. Characteristics of a panic attack include a sudden feeling of intense fear or anxiety that may be characterized by shortness of breath or hyper ventilating, heart pounding in the chest, ...



Satire

03 June 2013
By: Quinton Ellis, M.S.

Let's take a moment, here the end of another school year, with Memorial Day just passing and an interminably long summer beyond that, to put ourselves in the minds of too many of our children. Are they thinking about how they can't wait to get started on that "character building" summer job? Are they looking ...



The Odyssey Years

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, Masters of Science

I am pleased to report to all of you that our social scientists have been hard at work developing a name for the cloud that I and many others some ten years ago sprinted headlong into, clumsily navigated through, and emerged exhaustedly from only just recently. Their hard work has yielded the term "th...



Varsity Blues

03 June 2013
By: Quinton Ellis, M.S.

One of my favorite conversations to engage in with my clients is the one that begins after I express my relief regarding that client s discontentedness with his or her teenage existence. Well of course you hate your life, why shouldn t you? I m liable to remark. Let s face it, as adults, how many of us look b...



What Matters Most

03 June 2013
By: Quinton Ellis, M.S.

Some months ago EFC, in conjunction with Edmond s Character Council and our municipal juvenile courts, developed a community service alternative for teenagers dubbed the What Matters Most program. The purpose of the program would be to explore the concept of personal character and its relationship with the mo...



Youth is Wasted on the Young

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

“Youth is wasted on the young”. I enjoy asking teenagers to interpret this axiomatic quotation. Most don’t know what to make of it, which, one assumes, is confirmation of the quote’s wisdom. If I assign an adult the same task, I will always get an answer as to how young people screw so ...



And How Does That Make You Think?

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

“I know right?”

Have you heard this fairly recent addition to our American lexicon? I can’t be the only one who’s noticed. It’s been around for a couple of years. It is apparently used by a listener to convey to the speaker with great enthusiasm that he or she has he...



"He's Got a Lot of Potential"

03 June 2013

By: Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

I remember hearing that frequently when I was in elementary school and for some time after that. My parents, my teachers- they were all apparently very excited about all that I was capable of achieving- in the future. I remember finding it all incredibly satisfying as well as comforting at the time. Whateve...



Deadlines & Skinny Jeans

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

In my experience, deadlines are like the world’s worst ninjas. It’s not as though they just pop up in front of me, all black, silent, and awesome. No, it’s more like this particular ninja was following me all weekend, meticulously shadowing my every move. I know this because I tripped ov...



Idontcaratitis

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

I keep hearing “I don’t care” from the kids. It’s usually followed by some variant of exhalation ranging from the anachronistic “harrumph” to the recently ascendant “Napoleon Dynamite”. Both responses are meant to convey frustration. Why, they wonder, do I c...



Putting Off is Easy

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

Putting off an easy thing makes it hard. Putting off a hard thing makes it impossible. ~George Claude Lorimer

I can’t say that I’m familiar with this George Claude character, but I see evidence of the wisdom of his insight on a daily basis. In fact, I’m staring at it right...



The Day After

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis, M.S., LPC

The day after Bedlam I went to 7-11 and picked up a newspaper. Mainly I was after the sports section, because really, who wouldn’t want to relive that glorious night? As I was rummaging through the various sections, my eyes fell upon the cover of Parade magazine. The photograph depicted a pretty yo...



Love My Job

03 June 2013
By Quinton Ellis M.S., L.P.C.

I don’t know if everyone knows this already, but talk therapy with young people has a side-effect just as frightening as those from any pill. On occasion, a young person in therapy will experience the desire to become a therapist him or herself. Yeah, I know…creepy. Of course, it’s pe...



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